literature

What Is This Between Us?

Deviation Actions

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Literature Text

“Did you see the new trailer for Star Trek?”
“Yep.”
“Oh man… Spock looks so yum in it!”
*smiles warily* “Uh-huh.”

I don’t think you even notice my new t-shirt tonight. Used to be, you complimented me every chance you got, taking all the more delight in me blushing at each of your compliments, however small and probably delirious and undeserved they were.

“Wanna watch South Park ?”
“Eh, a bit later.”

Used to be you couldn’t stop talking to me, wanting to do things with me, spend every waking second of your day trying to be with me despite our obstacles. Now, I feel the harder I try to bring that back, the more distant and faraway you seem to go.

“So, are you playing WoW now?”
“Nope.”
“Then?”
“Just browsing.”
*pause/silence for 10 minutes.”

10 minutes? It feels like ten years before one of us dares to break the silence again with the only phrase we know to use now, in the comfort of our uneasy regularity.

“I love you”
“I love you too.”
*smiles*

It’s not just a phrase to you is it? Even today when I say it, I invoke in myself every little emotion attached to those words:

1I

Pronunciation:
ˈī, ə
Function:
pronoun
Etymology:
Middle English, from Old English ic; akin to Old High German ih I, Latin ego, Greek egō
Date:
Before 12th century
: The one who is speaking or writing


I in my conscious, subconscious and all forms of consciousness bear witness to this. I, of sound mind, or if you would rather, given in to complete insanity and lunacy surrender myself to this.

1love
Pronunciation:
ˈləv
Function:
noun
Etymology:
Middle English, from Old English lufu; akin to Old High German luba love, Old English lēof dear, Latin lubēre, libēreto please
Date:
before 12th century
1 a (1): strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties <maternal love for a child> (2): attraction based on sexual desire : affection and tenderness felt by lovers (3): affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests <love for his old schoolmates> b: an assurance of love <give her my love>2: warm attachment, enthusiasm, or devotion <love of the sea>3 a: the object of attachment, devotion, or admiration <baseball was his first love> b (1): a beloved person : DARLING —often used as a term of endearment (2)British —used as an informal term of address4 a: unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another: as (1): the fatherly concern of God for humankind (2):brotherly concern for others b: a person's adoration of God5: a god or personification of love6: an amorous episode : LOVE AFFAIR7: the sexual embrace : COPULATION8: a score of zero (as in tennis)9capitalized Christian Science : GOD

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Love. So simple it may appear when one just looks it up, and peruses the many meanings of the word, the many parts of speech dissected till one meaning seems more personal to the individual than the rest of them.

And I can say in good faith and in all honesty, I have loved you like I would a son, for the times you act like a five year old who is mad that he dropped his ice cream, or that Billy, the boy from down the street, kicked your tricycle down. I’ve loved you with the same sexual desire with which Helen and Paris hungered for each other, and yes, I would have launched a war for decades if it meant I could lie with you in bed as lovers. My love of you as a friend, a kindred spirit and companion for the many similar tastes we share when it comes to our trivial pursuits, Is great, and I believe one of the things that bond us so closely. You are more than what baseball or the Red Sox means to an average Bostonian, more than what clam chowder might hold as a position in their hearts. Love, Darling, Jaan, Amore, - all doing so well to extend and embody that you are my beloved, my heart so to speak, My Love. I can’t liken you to God, but I can say you I love dearly, and I thank God for making you my lover and soulmate.
Ah but what of the action itself? To love.


Main Entry:
2love

Function:
verb
Inflected Form(s):
loved; lov•ing
Date:
before 12th century
transitive verb1: to hold dear : CHERISH2 a: to feel a lover's passion, devotion, or tenderness for b (1): CARESS (2): to fondle amorously (3): to copulate with3: to like or desire actively : take pleasure in <loved to play the violin>4: to thrive in <the rose loves sunlight>intransitive verb: to feel affection or experience desire
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I’ve held you dear and close to my heart, whether we were separated by the limitations of our skins, or by the glaring computer screen distancing us at 2000 and more miles. I’ve felt the dizzying passions of your kiss, as you lay your lips upon mine and parted my soul with one searing conquest after another. I’ve felt your eyes lovingly and lustfully fondle me with its long and hard gazes, when your hands and lips could not do so. I’ve thrived in your love, feeling my happiness multiply, while my sadness divided and diminished in your presence and loving company. If the rose loves to joyously come alive in the sunlight, then so do I in the gracious bright company of you, my dear heart.

you
Pronunciation:
ˈyü, yə also yē
Function:
pronoun
Etymology:
Middle English, from Old English ēow, dative & accusative of gē you; akin to Old High German iu, dative of ir you, Sanskrit yūyam you
Date:
before 12th century
1 : the one or ones being addressed —used as the pronoun of the second person singular or plural in any grammatical relation except that of a possessive <you may sit in that chair><you are my friends><can I pour you a cup of tea> —used formerly only as a plural pronoun of the second person in the dative or accusative case as direct or indirect object of a verb or as object of   a preposition — compare THEE , THOU , YE , YOUR , YOURS


You. You who I have loved, do love, will forever love. You upon who I bestow the entirety of my heart, health, love and longevity, my faith, my belief, my hopes and dreams. My fears, my worries, my insecurities, my anger. You whom I trust and cherish above all, you.

I. Love. You.


And as the television’s glare illuminates you, as I sit and quietly pour my thoughts into this writing software… I wonder:
What does “I love you”, mean to you?




---------------------             ---------------------------          ------------------------

“Everything in the world…”
You don’t say it aloud, but looking into your eyes I can read the unsaid question on your lips, hovering just beneath the surface but screaming hunger through those rusted auburn eyes…

I know why you question me so avidly, I understand why your voice falters and hesitates in saying so many words you wish you could howl into my ears, penetrate my brain and shatter my heart into so many little pieces. Pieces you could almost wish I’d care enough to attempt to pick up and put back together like a children’s puzzle, a puzzle we could spend time together placing each delicate piece back into place, if only for the reason to enjoy each other’s company once more.

”I Love You Too”

My voice doesn’t waver under the rote, but my eyes glance up at you from my work, wishing they could penetrate your soul, could embrace your core and hold you until oblivion come.

I wish I could be…

Your heartbeat means everything to me, your every breath the only thing that gives me reason to live. The smile on your face brightens my day far better than any clear sky, and the giggle that escapes your lips after a particularly amusing alliteration on my part… Bliss. I will spend my entire life trying to prove to you exactly how much you mean to me…

My entire life to show you just what
“I love you” means to me…


“Everything…”
...
I'll let Babyjaan fill this box in...
(do the keywords too hun)- :iconzmann966:
-----------------------------------------

This is a fairly personal piece. A collaboration between myself and :iconzmann966:

I think you can tell where I end and he begins in this.

If you liked it.. please leave feedback both here AND on Z's page.
He truly is my muse most of the time.
And.. I love him.

© 2009 - 2024 trishna87
Comments18
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FreezingBlaze's avatar
Good luck. Whatever that may mean to either of you.